Tag Archives: jeff probst

Survivor: Philippines Twist (With Cast Spoilers!)

At the end of one of Survivor’s most boring reunion episodes ever last night (did we really need Blossom’s commentary on Colton?), Probst revealed the format for season 25, which will be held in the Philippines.  3 previous players who were evacuated for medical reasons in prior seasons will be returning for another shot.  And I have all the T on who the 3 returnees are, so if you want to know, click on the jump down below!

I have to be honest–I don’t love this idea.  I like the idea of bringing back people who were medevaced, but why only bring 3 among a cast of newbies? I’d much prefer they do all returnees or none.  How great would an “Unfinished Business” (a la a couple seasons of Amazing Race ago) be?  They could bring back people who made historically dumb moves (Erik, James), people who were medevaced, people who were eliminated due to purple rock debaucles, etc.  I could think up a full cast just off the top of my head.  But season 25 has already been filmed, so there’s no sense protesting it now.  Mark your calendars, because it looks like the season premiere of Survivor: Philippines will premiere on September 19th.

So who, exactly, is coming back? Find out more after the jump! WARNING: Clicking the link will reveal who the returning players are, so if you don’t want to know, don’t look! Continue reading


Survivor: One World Finale & Reunion

I know that 2 months ago I said I was ready to start blogging regularly again, and then I never came back.  Sorry bout it! I shouldn’t be disappearing again any time soon, though.  On to the Survivor finale & reunion!

All Hail Kim, Ruler of One World

Kim and her mustache: the unbreakable alliance

It was a clean sweep for Kim last night.  Winning both the million dollars and fan favorite must be pretty sweet, and it was well deserved.  Kim played an incredible game from start to finish.  She called most of the shots and was a challenge beast, and everyone knew it.  But not once (aside from Troyzan’s failed attempt) did anyone seriously consider getting rid of her.  She played this season just like Boston Rob did on Redemption Island: it was a benevolent dictatorship where the subjects were too brainwashed to even think about the threat their leader posed to the end game.

Now Kim, go take that $1.1 million you just won and buy yourself a lifetime supply of electrolysis appointments for that upper lip!

Kat’s Final Tribal 180

Was anyone as bum-puzzled (thanks, Jay, for my new favorite adjective) by Kat’s speech at the final tribal?  I was fully expecting a vitriolic tirade wherein Jeff had to tell her to wrap it up.  Since her blindside, Kat has been the bitterest Betty since Russell Hantz.  And then she came out with that totally heartfelt, uplifting speech.  Who knew she possessed that level of maturity?  Not me!

Colton & Alicia

I’m sorry, but I’m not buying any of what these two were selling last night.  While I’m sure Colton isn’t attending regular KKK meetups, I do think the lady doth protest too much when it came to the racism accusations. But half the reunion was dedicated to him, so I’m over it. NEXT!

Alicia, too, was full of hot air in her teary apology at the reunion.  I’m a special education teacher too, and it takes a LOT to offend me, but even I winced when she made the comment comparing Christina to her students.  Aside from that, though, I really am concerned in general that she is a teacher of America’s youth.  I fear for the future of this nation. Alicia, I beg of you: quit your teaching job and find something better suited to your skill set.  It’s too bad Flavor of Love is off the air–you would have been perfect for that show.

Final Thoughts on One World

I loved the concept of One World.  I wish they would do it again sometime and stick to it longer (before mixing up the tribes).  Over the years, Survivor has come up with some very interesting twists and then given up on them too early in the season.  Meanwhile, we got stuck with Redemption Island for 2 whole craptastic seasons.  But I digress.

Overall this season was kind of forgettable for me.  The only players who were remotely entertaining (Troyzan) or likeable (Jonas) were voted out too early.    Previous seasons have fallen into this trap before, where the editing gets too focused on one person (think of Samoa and Redemption Island), and you barely see anything else.  While Kim’s game was nearly flawless, it wasn’t exactly thrilling to watch.

Oh Well.  There’s always next season.  I’m pretty stoked for the twist (previously med-evac’ed players returning for a second chance), but that’s a discussion for anther blog (which will be posted relatively soon, so stay tuned)!

Episode 9: Cut Throat 11/9

This week’s episode of Survivor was way over-hyped in promos, but that’s not to say it wasn’t great.  I appreciated the fast-forward, since both eliminations were fairly obvious, and it saved us from an extra episode’s worth of Jim whining (more on that later).

Ozzy Voted Out

Ozzy’s banishment to Redemption Island was the best case scenario for everyone, I think. Upolu (and Cochran) eliminated a huge challenge threat.  All the remaining Savaii members dodged a bullet.  Ozzy, at least for now, can play the game without his self-righteousness and utter lack of social skills getting in the way.  We, the viewers, are being given a break from his his delusional spewing.  It’s a win-win-win-win.

This probably goes without saying, but Ozzy is far too confident about his chances on Redemption Island.  The duels are not run-of-the-mill Survivor obstacle courses.  They typically require some degree of mental ability, which Ozzy clearly lacks.  And now that they’ve merged, he’ll be up against much more worthy opponents.

What Happened to Jim?

I was really starting to like Jim up until he called Cochran a coward two weeks ago.  And no, that’s not just because I’m a Cochran fantard (which I am).  Up until the merge, Jim made it abundantly clear that he was willing to slit any throats necessary to advance himself in the game.  And yet, when someone (Cochran) did it to him, Jim’s all of a sudden on a soapbox made of integrity and righteousness?  Please.  He’s my least favorite type of Survivor player–the one who can dish it out but can’t take it.

He really screwed up with his “rousing speech” strategy, too.  When has that EVER worked?  I get that he was backed into a corner and pretty much had no other options, but the fact that he had even slight confidence in that plan is totally baffling.

Other Stuff

  • Upolu is still solid at this point, but you can see the cracks starting to form.  They’re an alliance of 5 type-A people (and Rick), so I wouldn’t be surprised at all if some splinter groups form within the next couple of weeks.
  • I’m curious how the 3 people on RI thing will play out, because I do recall Jeff Probst saying in an interview (or on twitter, I forget) that there would only be two-person duels this season.
  • Cochran should stop wearing Coach’s blazer.  He looks like a toddler in it.
  • Actually, Coach should stop wearing Coach’s blazer too. He looks like a douche in it.
  • The budding bromance between Cochran and Brandon is absolutely bizarre.  I don’t think it’ll last.

Rick Speaks! Episode 6 (10/19)

I’m not really going to get into the Redemption Island duel, since it was boring and a waste of time (mostly because I haven’t cared an iota about any duelee so far this season).  Moving on…

Ozzy Fails at Strategy

I love a good blindside.  I especially love when a delusional weenie with a God complex finds out no one respects him (and no, I’m not talking about Coach).  Ozzy really brought the crazy tonight, first trying to calmly reason it out with his tribe.  Only, “I’m now what they call a free agent,” isn’t really reasonable.

Once Ozzy realized that road would lead to nowhere, he switched gears and tried to play the victim.  When Dawn (love her!) called him out for being a hypocrite, Ozzy just lost it.  He blurted out in frustration that he has the hidden immunity idol.

The next day, he realized how screwed he was and tried to spin the whole idol blab as “trying to reunify” with everyone.  In his confessional, he said he was trying to just do his best and “lead by example.”  I’m sorry, Ozzy, what are you leading?  Your alliance of one?  Or your tribe of people who neither like nor respect you?  Cochran said it best: “He’s just behaving like a stupid bitch.”

Mikayla Fails at Slingshots, Life

Mikayla really did suck at the immunity challenge.  And she was a stubborn dumbass for not just dropping out when it became obvious that her coconut-slinging skills were subpar.  If you suck at a challenge, there’s not much you can do other than step aside so the others can get it done.  Refusing to step aside tells the tribe that your ego is more important than teamwork.

I’ve never liked Mikayla.  I think she’s whiny, not all that intelligent, and she’s yet to make me laugh at all.  Plus, she gave Brandon a tingly feeling in his privates, although I guess I can’t really hold that against her, since that’s about the only entertainment she’s brought to the season.  I’m not at all disappointed Mikayla got voted out.  I’m just happy they kept Edna.  I like Edna.  She knows exactly how to kiss Coach’s ass.  I hope she makes it far.

Other Notes

  • Coach, when considering whether he should tell Brandon about the idol, said “Is witholding information lying?  It’s a gray area.”  HOW OLD ARE YOU?!
  • Rick is no longer invisible!  How exciting!  Although I must say, his voice is disappointingly un-twangy.
  • I love Edna’s makeshift visor.  It appears to be made out of a treemail and a string.  It makes me laugh every time I see it.  It’s just so ridiculous looking.
  • Brandon, when trying to tell Jeff that the next challenge was crucial to Upolu’s success post-merge, said “This next challenge is detrimental to the way this game turns out.”  It’s OK, Brandon.  Words are hard.
  • Edna’s little vote confessional to Mikayla was possibly the best I’ve ever heard.  As she held up Mikayla’s name, she said, “I hope your time here has helped your future modeling career.”  Edna, you passive-aggressive bitch!  Brilliant!

Taste the Victory 10/12

Survivor: South Pacific delivered yet again last night.  They’re showing significantly less Redemption Island footage this season, allowing for more time to develop the plot in the “real” game.  Whether this was an intentional format change or simply a coincidence, I don’t know.  But I like it.

Redemption Island

The episode started out with Stacey and Christine griping on RI.  Stacey is a bitter bitch, but she makes me laugh.  She said her tribe was “going to hell with gasoline drawers on,” for chrissake.  Where does she come up with this stuff?  Once she got into her whole “Benjamin” speech at the duel, though, it became apparent that she’s legitimately off her rocker and should probably be medicated.  Her one-liners will be missed.

Coach “Don’t Call Me Benjamin” Wade

Coach seems to have erased a lot of his progress this week.  For the past few episodes he’s been coming across as a lot more mature, sane, and likable than past seasons.  But last night, Coach was back to doing Coach things (calling himself “Dragon” after finding the idol, for example).  It’s only a matter of time before the stories about pygmy cannibals start up again.  Sigh.

Middle-Aged Ozzy

Over on Savaii, Ozzy continues to prove that he’s learned nothing from his past failures in this game.  He’s still the same old judgmental, narcissistic guy he always was, only now he’s older and less in-shape.  He really thought he was running the game up until Elyse was blindsided, and I was happy to see him knocked down a few pegs. I can’t wait to see how that whole storyline unfolds next week, and I’m sure he’ll be needing his hidden immunity idol soon enough.

Whose Meat Weighs the Most?

The immunity challenge made the middle schooler in me giggle.  It was one “That’s what she said” after another.  Who doesn’t love a good inadvertent penis joke (or twenty)?  Both teams fought hard to fit the most meat in their mouths (teehee), but ultimately, Upolu’s meat was more massive (haha) and they won immunity.  They also won reward, which consisted of spices, veggies, and all 22 pounds of regurgitated meat from the challenge.  Yum.

Coch-Train Survives Again

While I would have loved to see Ozzy go last night, Savaii needs to keep their tribe strong until the merge, so Elyse was the next best thing.  I think they made a wise decision.  I do, however, think that Keith & Whitney were dumb to vote for Dawn.  I know they were trying to avoid ruffling any feathers, but being non-committal like that often has the opposite effect. They’ve made it clear that they’re not really loyal to either side, and wild cards can be perceived as very threatening in this game.

I’ll be interested to see who wins the duel next week.  I’m also very excited to see how Ozzy handles the realization that he’s not running the game anymore.  I can’t wait for next week’s episode!

Survivor: South Pacific Cast Breakdown!

The cast of Survivor: South Pacific has been released on CBS.com, and it looks like a pretty diverse and interesting group of people!  We already know that Coach and Ozzy will be returning, and I’ve made my feelings on each of them pretty well known, so I want to take a look at everyone else.  Just like this season of Big Brother, we’ve got a pretty wide range in ages.  It seems like CBS is stepping away from the usual group of 20somethings with just a couple older folks thrown in.  The two tribes are called Upolu and Savaii.  This year is going to be another cast of 18, so let’s take a look at the 16 newbies!  I’m just giving you the highlights of each person’s bio, so if you want to read their full bios, check out CBS.com!

There’s a LOT to cover, so let’s dive right in!

Continue reading

It’s Confirmed! Coach & Ozzy returning for Survivor: South Pacific!

CBS released the cast of Survivor: South Pacific (which premieres on September 14th, same night as the BB finale!) on their website today.  But let’s be honest–no one cares about anyone in that cast except the returning players.  And it turns out the rumors were true–it’s Coach and Ozzy!

According to the photo on CBS.com, it’s gonna be a battle of the mullets!

coach and ozzy

Come on now.  I’d expect this type of douche-tastic hairdo from Coach.  But Ozzy!  What happened to you?  You used to be hot.  Now you’re clearly unstable, as evidenced by the 70s porn star collar and what might be the most heinous hair style I’ve ever seen on a man.  Amanda must be laughing her ass off right about now.

Seriously, though, is anyone else completely disinterested in watching this?  Coach’s act got old in Tocantins, and it was bad enough having to suffer through it a second time in Hereos vs. Villains.  Then it was even worse watching it poorly mimicked by Phillip in Redemption Island.  But now we’re going there AGAIN?  Ugh.

Ozzy proved how much of a weenie he really is in Micronesia, and his boot that season was one of the most satisfying blindsides ever.  Seeing his mulleted mug on my television now is just overkill.

Between Big Brother and Survivor, we’ve seen our fair share of returning player seasons.  Returning players don’t inherently make a bad season, but there’s a lesson to be learned here, so bear with me.  There was Survivor: Guatemala (with Stephenie and Bobby Jon), BB11 (with Mr. Pectacular himself, the ever-repulsive Jessie), Survivor Micronesia (fans vs. favorites), Survivor: Redemption Island (with Boston Rob and Russell), and of course, the current season of BB (with the ‘dynamic duos’ of Jordeff, Brenchel, and the Donatos).   Stephenie made it to the final two in Guatemala.  Parvati (a ‘favorite’) won Micronesia.  Boston Rob completely dominated (and won) Redemption Island.  Jessie likely would have won BB11 if he hadn’t been so despicable (forcing production to introduce the Coup de Tat to get him out).  And in the current season of BB, despite a numbers disadvantage and giant targets on their backs since day 1,  two of the final 6 are veterans.

My point: Why the hell do the newbies always let the returnees get so far?  It happens every time.  Wouldn’t the returning players be the easiest, most obvious targets?  Wouldn’t  you make it your goal to get them out first?  The newbies always say that’s their plan, and then they never follow through.  I know I’m on a bit of a tangent here, but I’m just really hoping that the newbies in South Pacific have a little sense and are able to send Coach, Ozzy, AND their mullets packing early.

After I get some sleep (my head is still reeling from the Double Eviction episode of Big Brother!), I’ll be doing a breakdown of the rest of the South Pacific cast, so stay tuned!